The Journey of Life

From a forward email

Every woman is seen off from her home on two occasions. Once when she leaves her parents' home to get married, and the second time when she leaves her home in this world to travel to her abode in the hereafter.

Each girl grows up knowing that her parents, home is not her permanent home and that she will one day have to bid her family farewell to settle in her own home. If only all young girls would wait in anticipation for and dream about their second farewell as much as they do for the first. If only they would prepare for the second one as much as they do for the first. if only each parent would mentally and physically prepare their daughters for the second departure as much as they do for the first. Although the reality is that we should prepare for the second far more than the first, for our eternal fate depends on how well we are received when we reach our final destination.

Consider the following:

*During the first farewell, there is a great anxiety about whether or not the husband-to-be will be happy with her. Whereas for the second journey we have to worry whether or not Allah will be pleased with what He sees.

*Before the first journey the girl will take a long bath to beautify herself, whereas for the second she will be bathed by others.

*During the first journey she takes a grand trousseau with her, whereas the trousseau for the second journey is nothing but righteous deeds.

*She will share her joy with every woman present at her first farewell, whereas during the second one she will be all alone.

*During her first farewell she is dressed in the most expensive of outfits to please her husband, whereas the dress that will beautify and adorn her for the second journey is the the attire of "Taqwa".

*Invitations are handed out to celebrate the auspicious event of her Wedding. here Allah Himself invites her to Jannah. And Allah invites towards the abode of peace." (Al-Quraan)

*For her arrival, her new home in this world is decorated. For her arrival in Jannah Allaah decorates Jannah such that "no eye has ever seen, no ear has ever heard, nor has such beauty ever crossed anyone's imagination" (Hadeeth).

*On the occasion of a wedding, the hosts welcome the guests. Imagine a celebration in Jannah, where the host is Allah and we are the guests! Imagine being welcomed by Allah, while the angels also greet us.

*When we attend a wedding we are given appetizers. When we enter Jannah each person will be given a piece of bread as an appetizer that will encapsulate all the flavours of the world.

*If the husband is happy with her, the first night the woman spends with him is most cherished, and she never ever has nor will enjoy such blissful sleep as she does on the night of her wedding. Similarly, if Allah is happy with us when we journey to Him, the Hadeeth states that the person is told in his/her grave "Sleep in the (peaceful/blissful) manner that a bride does."

*If she is not accepted at her first home in the world, there is always the option of retuning to the sanctuary of her parents' home where she will be taken care of. There could even be a second chance to build a new home. Whereas if we are not accepted in the court of Allah after the second farewell, there is no other place of refuge and no second chance.

Ponder O sister! Which farewell should we concern ourselves with more.

In Fond Memory of Her

Day before yesterday, I was walking through the footpath lined with small shrubs, when I noticed some sparrows on those bushes. It sparked the memory of my grandma or uppuma as I used to call her. She had given me an embroidered pillow case with sparrows and the words 'Good Night' and 'Sweet Dreams'. With time, the pillow cases' clothes got worn out, but the embroidery she did has been intact......

She was an amazing woman. A very talented person, an all-rounder. She used to sing, tell us stories, she used to do very intricate embroidery, be up to date with politics and current affairs......a prodigy we all used to look up to. We could easily learn from her that looks never really mattered, it is the substance you are inside that makes you and your world.

Next week and it will be 2 years since she passed away. Our life goes on...but we do miss her....and the person who misses her the most, is her better half....my grandpa.....when I look into his eyes, I can see loneliness, which he tries to hide and he tries to move on as well.....and believe me he has been doing a great job at that!

Follower of the Crowd or A Trendsetter?

Let me begin with a question to all of you out there, just think about it, and see how practical it is. If given the option of either being a trendsetter or a follower of the crowd, what would you choose?

The choice is upto you, but I'm quite sure most of you would've chosen to be a trendsetter. Everyone likes to be different and also be appreciated. When someone looks upto you, you'll feel great!!! But how practical is it to be a trendsetter? Especially our society (in particular my society, with people who like being typical and can't stand changes!!!) ...being a trendsetter attracts all the eyes on you and criticism and what not!!!! So, most people, even though they aspire to become a trend-setter, they tend to be a follower of the crowd. Just do what the society expects me to do and then I need not hear people's comments!

But are you really happy? Trying to live the way people expect you to live? Come on, give me a break!! People themselves have no idea what they want in life, what will you do trying to satisfy them. And even if you manage to satisfy some, you won't be able to satisfy everyone....'coz each one has different tastes. Am I telling you to be a trendsetter? No! Then am I advising you to be a follower of the crowd? No! Just be YOURSELF!!!

Being yourself is the toughest thing in life.....'coz we have our own dilemmas regarding how to be ourself. By being yourself, you bring out your individuality and tend to appreciate people for what they are, rather than who they are. Another important aspect while being yourself is that you need people around you who helps you be yourself, in which case not all are lucky!

I've lived my life so far my way. I've lived my beliefs and I've never tried to hide what I am, even though I don't necessarily open up to everyone. Being honest with myself has always given me satisfaction and peace of mind. Supportive people around me are one of my biggest strengths. I don't know if it is because of my personality or individuality, I've had people (whom I assumed to be typical) support me on the untypical things I do and telling me to go forward with my views. Alhamdulillah.

I've never tried to be a trendsetter, 'coz I don't like to be the center of attraction and I'm a human being, I have my own flaws and I hate being a follower of the crowd as well. I just like to be myself, stay true to myself, live on my whims and well, I can't hurt people around me who care for me and who have always supported me. My parents, my siblings, my friends, my extended family members.......I've always had someone or the other support me. Alhamdulillah.

I'm just hoping that things go on the same, even when seasons change.......hoping for the best....

My Virtual Realm

I've been thinking about all the social networking sites and how we maintain the friends and connections out there and am quite reluctant to really go out and speak to the person when I come face to face.

Yes...this happened to me recently. There's this person on my friend's list in a social networking site and well, 2 weeks ago, she was standing some distance away from me. I wanted to go tell her 'Hi', but then I wondered if she would remember me, 'coz the last time we met was maybe 6 years back and she wouldn't really recognize me or so I thought. Maybe a smile wouldn't have hurt, but well, she wasn't looking in my direction.

That is my nature. Some might portray it as arrogance, but I'm quite reluctant to go and say a 'Hi' or even smile if I 'think' that the person might not know me, even if I know the person!!

Ironically I was reading this article in the In-flight magazine last week, 'Smileys or Smile?' and I couldn't help but reflect on myself, a social animal on the social networking sites, but very selective in real life!!! Well, this is a Virtual Realm....an Illusion.....and my very own Utopia. I present here what I want and it could just be a deception!!! Thatz one of the reasons I don't add people whom I haven't met at least once personally on any of the social networking sites, 'coz I don't want to give a false impression n neither do I want to deceive.

Sorry my dear friend(s)......for not coming to you to say a 'Hi'!! It so happened during last year that I went and told a 'Hi' to one of my classmates from high school and she didn't recognize me, that has made me even more reluctant to open myself up....in reality!